Phone Message

Your mom called. You forgot your lunch.

Sanity

“I single-handedly lost my mind”.

House of Pain

Most accidents happen in the home. But which home? I say it’s probably “Excruciating Pain Home”.

Skin a cat

They say there’s more than one way to skin a cat. There are, in fact, two:

1. Get a cat and skin it
2. Make a skinning motion in the air and wait for a cat to walk into your path