Chad the Impaler

Wrestler

Why I won’t “do the bearcat”

• If the bearcat were to convince me to “leave my home” I would join the ranks of thousands of homeless, thus putting unnecessary strain on an already stressed charitable organization network.
• I don’t need the kind of sound that I “couldn’t leave alone”. I have enough distractions.
• I don’t have the room for a bearcat of my own. Plus, I already have two cats. I don’t think they’re compatible.
• The line “George Washington” is a non sequitur used to distract from the bearcat’s true larcenous intentions, or possibly some sort of bearcat-to-bearcat (B2B) codeword.
• I don’t really want my backbone to slip, opening the door to further degenerative spinal afflictions, such as Sciatica and Spondylosis.

Despite the fact that the bearcat is “lookin’ for me”, I hope my general attitude will be enough to convince him to look elsewhere.

Squish, a Squid